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"I knew there was a better way of life that I was just trying to find |
Crysis 2 ...and there is a reason why I completed this game now, but more on that later, is plastic surgery done on an already beautiful face. Although the environments are gorgeously rendered, even more so after the massive DirectX and tessellation update, the city of New York feels totally sterile and a bit like duck lips.
Aside from the sick people, there was no city grime or decay, or that vibrant aesthetic feeling of “New York” anywhere to be found, granted the city has been overrun by aliens, but still. It’s sort of an intangible, and probably tough to re-create in the context of a video game, when what I’m actually talking about is a feeling. Think The Seven-Ups, but with aliens! The "city" feeling I got from this game was: Anywhere USA, but with tall buildings. I think an organic day and night cycle might have helped, or infected homeless offering to put a spit-shine on my Nanosuit. Crytek did make “improvements” to the original game play that effected how the suit works, some of which were good, the rest sort of sucked, but luckily did not impede or get in the way.
Either/or, I still had fun playing this game.
Also, when romping through an action filled FPS nothing screams SUCK more than having to backtrack in order to find emails, car keys and various NYC souvenirs that unlock terrible concept art, and other assorted total wastes of time.
Oh, I almost forgot, completing the game: after installing the 1.9 patch it seemed to wipe out various sound effects, namely footsteps and the sound that accompanied jumping. I was beyond pissed, and scoured the internet for solutions, but found bupkis. I abandoned the game. Two weeks ago I decided to weather the sans sounds and complete the game. I realized that I had turned on a stealth augment that muffled those particular sounds. I turned it off and viola, the footsteps and accompanying jump sound had returned. Squee!
EHFCS rates this game: B+
Graphics: B+ | Sound: B | Playability: B+
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I want to like you despite yourself. |
This game is a mishmash of “been there done that” wrapped up in a cosmetically beautiful shell that only allows you to get to second base. In some spots it feels utterly neglected, abandoned and hurried, while other moments reveal true gaming brilliance, those instances are far and few, and it continually stops just short of a metaphorical "happy ending."
RAGE gave me blue balls.
RAGE wants to be many things (shooter, driving game, RPG, Borderlands, Fallout) but accomplishes only a few dynamic moments within set-pieces really well. It’s like having a friend stay on your couch that keeps promising to get a job, despite his or her failed attempt at being something artistic, they always say, "I'll make it happen tomorrow!" They're actually quite good at being creative, but they can’t seem to be able to set the alarm clock… they always fall short! RAGE is just like that. Or maybe your "artistic" friend drew one good picture early on in their life and everything after that sucked?
Considering ID's pedigree (Doom, Quake), I was hoping for more, and the pre-launch hype for this game was really intense, but as with all things that are usually driven by hype, it falls way short of expectations. I’m not saying that RHAGE is a bad game, like I said, it does some things extremely well, but overall, the game has no feeling or any real purpose.
I wonder what effect the poor sales of this title will have on the development of Doom 4.
EHFCS rates this game: B
Graphics: B+ | Sound: B | Playability: B
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"If your time to you is worth savin’ "The hairs on your arm will stand up. |
Dead Island is a veritable, never-ending whack-a-zombie! It’s an endless barrage of the undead as they limp, run, slide, slither, amble, drool and explode in your general direction through various well crafted and immensely detailed environments. My character was a badass, ex-junkie rapper that, when in ultra-pissed mode, could cold-cock a zombie's head clean off with one enraged punch! He is also partial to blunt weapons like the mace, morning star, tonfa and cudgel, although nothing really splatters zombie head-meat into goo like a good old fashioned heavy crowbar! Alternatively, curb stomping skull and living dead brains into vinaigrette was also immensely satisfying.
There was this one, really intense, 12 hour play session, where afterwards I felt emotionally sticky, and physically exhausted as dark chunks of jelly filled head implosions, bone breakage, zombie moans and ghoulish, lifeless groans danced viscerally in my peripheral vision. It was awful. At one point, as my cat meowed at me to be fed, I swear she was moaning for the sweet sustenance that was my flesh.
Dead Island is incredibly fun, but I needed a rest, and some therapy after playing this game, which is exactly why I highly recommend it!
EHFCS rates this game: B+
Graphics: B+ | Sound: B+ | Playability: A+
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Rapture is not just a state of mind? |
This effort came as a bit of a surprise. I was aware of some planned DLC for BioShock 2 a while back, but forgot all about it when it was canceled for the PC. Yesterday, I accidentally discovered that the DLC has indeed been available since May 31, 2011! The $10.00 'Minerva’s Den' and the free 'Protector Trials' continues the adventure deep below in Rapture. Although, Minerva’s Den is short, it is an elegant, incredible mini-story, while the Protector Trials is like Big Daddy training for points, er... ADAM.
"Before you can do things for people, you must be the kind of man who can get things done. But to get things done, you must love the doing, not the people! Your own work, not any possible object of your charity. I'll be glad if men who need it find a better method of living in the house I built, but that's not the motive of my work, nor my reason, nor my reward! My reward, my purpose, my life, is the work itself - my work done my way! Nothing else matters to me!" - Howard Roark
Stepping back into Rapture once again confirmed how remarkably unparalleled this gaming experience is. The damp solitude of traversing utopia gone terribly wrong left me once again totally engrossed. My only complaint: that the game was over! This was a great surprise!
"What is the difference between a man and a parasite? A man builds. A parasite asks 'Where is my share?' A man creates. A parasite says, 'What will the neighbors think?' A man invents. A parasite says, 'Watch out, or you might tread on the toes of God...'" - Andrew Ryan
EHFCS rates this game: A+
Graphics: A+ | Sound: A+ | Playability: A+
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I think she's pissed. Maybe, she's ...just confused? Nope... she's definitely pissed. F.3.A.R. |
I have played all the F.E.A.R., or First Encounter Assault Recon, games, even when the developer split, then released two competing sequel/add-ons, I played and liked them both. It was like getting a bonus game/sequel/add-on based on the same material. I have even played each game a few times over.
I still have no idea what F.E.A.R., or First Encounter Assault Recon, actually is, and I don’t think I really care. Each iteration has had great action, is oftentimes scary, sometimes very scary ...and is an exceptional FPS experience.
F.3.A.R., or First Third Assault Recon, (except for the movie Se7en, I hate when numbers are used as letters. Ke$ha is the worst, but technically she’s using a symbol to indicate how horrible she is). F.3.A.R. does not disappoint, providing an action packed romp through stylized weirdness infused with moments that are visually and emotionally macabre.
EHFCS rates this game: A+
Graphics: A+ | Sound: A+ | Playability: A+
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Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens ...and babes. |
"There is NO WAY this game lives up to the HYPE!" FUN! "The graphics are not modern, there are no post rendering effects or tessellation!" Um. Yeah. Ok. But it was FUN! "The references are really old, and..." FUN! "The car sequences are lame, and the enemies just drop dead!" "The plot was not resolved by the end of the game!" "The puzzles were not 'Duke like' and..." Well. Blow it out your ASS! FUN! FUN! FUN! People just seem to really want to hate this game, regardless.
But, yeah ...this game is cooking on all cylinders. A grand experience of mindless, mind numbingly numb... FUN! Remember when games were supposed to be fun, and not some visceral cacophony of emotional experiences, and intricate plot points constantly moving the story forward? Perhaps I might be speaking to the wrong generation here, trying to convince a gene pool raised on handheld devices and parented by consoles, that this effort, while lacking the zeitgeist of modern gaming standards, is exactly as it should be. I bet there is not a latchkey kid among us that did not love this game for sentimental reasons. It's about subtlety, it's about nuance, distinction, ass-kicking, breasts and, oh yeah... FUN!!!
Additionally, completing the game unlocks a whole grip of interactive extras depicting various stages of Nukem development history. As an event unto itself, in gaming history, one cannot deny the importance and lore of Duke Nukem.
And in terms of the anticipation factor: Duke Nukem Forever is NOT Duke Nukem Episode 1: The Pig Cop Menace.
EHFCS rates this game: B+
Graphics: B+ | Sound: B+ | Playability: A+
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It's been a loooong time. |
Um ...basically, Portal 2's single player & co-op game, plus Steam as distributor and client, all represent a heightened level of gaming enjoyment, experience, product platform and distribution.
Everything here is done right, and sets the bar remarkably high for all other developers and distributors: if you’re gonna bring it… it had better be broughten good.
Text cannot do this game justice, nor fully convey, without being some long garrulous verbose tedious wordy loquacious flowery voluble dissertation, it's true awesome powers ...it simply MUST be experienced.
EHFCS rates this game: A+
Graphics: A+ | Sound: A+ | Playability: A+
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Plausible? |
Short. Like obvious DLC Coming Soon short. Mini-Me middle finger short. Godzilla vs Bambi short!
NOTE: I NEVER play, nor do I even CARE about, or will ever review multiplayer in any game EVER, so... there. NOTE: Note the BOLDED words: NEVER, CARE, multiplayer, EVER ...just so we're clear on that.
EHFCS rates this game: C+
Graphics: B+ | Sound: C | Playability: C+
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So many ways to make a person cry. |
One and-uh two and-uh kick and shoot, then impale, slice, explode, leash, destroy, slide, thump, incinerate, drill, gouge, stun, exterminate, liquefy, curse, dismember, decapitate, joke, squish, electrify ...and drink. then repeat. a lot.
It never gets old, EVER!
EHFCS rates this game: B+
Graphics: B+ | Sound: B | Playability: A+
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Lions Dead Space 2 |
After playing this game I wondered what all the hysterical fuss was about. Those ads with the parents flipping out, while being convincing, belied the actual depth of the game.
I would prefer that parents become more concerned with how painfully bad and egregiously violent some of the latest war games are, or how much time their kids play on the phone while at dinner, or the music they are listening to, which by all accounts, is just utterly terrible, than worrying about eviscerating an onslaught of biologically altered human-monsters.
The game is scary, fun, scary-fun, and plays well. Visceral got the key mapping right this time, which for arrow key movement players like myself, is awesome. It should be a given, and I did have some trepidation while loading it, then actual relief to find out how customizable the key mapping was. Great job!
Buy it. Play it. Love it. Play it again. I am.
EHFCS rates this game: A
Graphics: B+ | Sound: B+ | Playability: A+
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n. |
Most popular comic book/superhero games have historically sucked ...wait, have historically sucked beyond belief (save for Batman Arkham Asylum), it was very cool to get behind the wheel of a character that displayed some superhero ass kicking characteristics while residing in a game that also kicked ass. You're some loner dude, with genetically imbued monstrous powers, in a hoodie who's pissed off at the folks that made him that way.
I'm not all that jazzed about the hoodie, but the game was so good and fun that I rarely cared. This is a game from 09, so you might have to do some scrounging around to locate it, but it's well worth the download or the $19.00 bucks it will cost you.
EHFCS rates this game: A
Graphics: B+ | Sound: B+ | Playability: A+
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Yuck. |
This game sucks.
It got to the point where I would unload whole cartridges of ammo into the back of my squadmate's head as each one of these douche bags repeatedly walked directly into my line of fire.
Really? Constantly!
I began to hate these guys. Then I began to hate this game on every level imaginable. This is NOT, in any way, reminiscent of the previous MOH games (which had emotion, intensity, class and were very fun to play). I could fill an entire page with my political rantings about what a horrible conflict the Afghanistan war is, and that maybe portraying the participants as the actual war continues is nothing short of weird and uncomfortable, but why bore you with my ramblings?
This title is an embarrassment.
EHFCS rates this game: D
Graphics: C | Sound: C | Playability: F
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d'Artagnan, Athos, Porthos, Aramis! |
"I am War, hear me roar
In numbers too big to ignore
And I know too much to go back an' pretend
'cause I've heard it all before
And I've been down there on the floor
No one's ever gonna keep me down again..."
This purely hack 'n slash endeavor was ported beautifully to the PC. What's cool is that you don't see many titles like this for the PC, there have been a few, but they have been terrible. This effort transcends all the miserable failures before it and presents a fun, epic, rewarding journey.
"I am strong (strong)
I am invincible (invincible)
I am War!"
EHFCS rates this game: A
Graphics: A | Sound: B+ | Playability: A
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No keyboard/mouse + movement control customization whatsoever. |
Not this again. A developer/company that has the gumption to drop a title with no mouse/keyboard customization should be slathered in tar, then pelted with bull testicles. Installed. Looked for the movement customization menu. Found nothing. Uninstalled.
I cannot recommend a game that omits such basic, but necessary requirements. If you are a WASD or controller person then have at it.
EHFCS rates this game: D+
Graphics: C | Sound: B+ | Playability: F-
EHFCS rates this game: C+ (WASD Rating)
Graphics: C | Sound: B+ | Playability: C+
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Who's the white ex-CIA operative that's a sex machine to all the chicks? Fisher! Ya damn right! |
If Sam Fisher were my father, I would have totally disappointed him.
I'm not very stealthy. I don't have good aim, and I don't know how to take down multiple targets at one time. I think Sam's son would have to be a cross between James Bond, Bruce Lee, David H. Hackworth, and Chesty Puller.
Playing this game made me want to be a better, stealthier killer/rogue assassin. When Sam... uh, I mean ...Mr. Fisher, would praise my actions in voice over (voiced beautifully since 2002 by Michael Ironside) I beamed with inner pride, but when he was displeased with my actions cum choices he would growl, "That could have gone better" or "Ya know, eric, if only you would have listened to me, planned ahead and not gone off all halfcocked, then maybe... maybe things might have worked out, and your mom and I would still be married" ...um... wait... he didn't really say that... but it was implied, and as a result of that implication, I wanted to make him even more proud, and carry out each mission as smoothly, and as surgically as possible. This is a fun game, a bit short... but fun nonetheless.
No glitches, the controls are a dream, and the enemy AI puts up a good fight.
Yeah, Sam Fisher is one bad motherf--ker! And at the end of the day, if units of Sam Fisher's proud were measured in a percentage, I would say I earned a good 60% ...I'm ok with that.
EHFCS rates this game: B+
Graphics: A | Sound: B | Playability: B+
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Um... what? |
In Singularity you play as some random dude that has to do something between the span of two different times in chronological space time something or other, Nazis. The bad guys really messed things up back then, which had ill effects on the current line of space time, and in order to set things right you have to make some moral choices, fight some monsters and undo some of the bullshit so you can be "that guy" ...or not.
Singularity is a good, but an utterly forgettable experience. It's also a mashing together of about seven other cool games including some yummy bits from: Fallout 3, Bioshock (think Pip-Boy videos) and every other game that uses time as a device. However, in this instance using time to reconstruct or deconstruct inanimate objects and living tissue was actually a clever spin, albeit an utterly forgettable one. There were some good scary moments, no glitches and the story was mildly convincing ...in an utterly forgettable way.
This is an in-between game.
EHFCS rates this game: B-
Graphics: B+ | Sound: C | Playability: B+
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"I am doorman from Russian Kretchma, she fall down!" (that was a line I had from a high school play I was in). |
After my long involved date with Assassin's Creed II, I was ready to pounce back into and around the dirty streets of GTA IV (which I have yet to finish) but after the last patch led to some graphical glitches (huh?) it really pissed me off (again). I also immediately longed for the fluid, uber detailed perfection ...and AA16x that was Ezio's Renaissance Italy. I mean shadow flickers GTAIV? Really? C’mon!
I don't think my love/hate relationship with GTA IV is destined to change anytime soon, but I am determined to finish it. In the interim, I was jonesing for something good to play. I had started Metro 2033 during the early stages of AC II, but AC II soon stole my sole. So after, I went back to Metro 2033 and it provided just the right amount of distraction spice that I needed before settling into something else. This is a rebound game. Metro 2033 is based on a popular book by a young Russian writer/journalist and takes place after a global nuclear holocaust in Russia within the underground metro rail system where humanity has carved out a meager and brutal existence. Sound familiar? But why read the book when I can just play the game?
The few complaints I have are this: 1) a shoddy, indecipherable weapon system, and 2) some QuickTime events that were beyond useless: "quickly press MMB" ...shut up! Other than that it was a pretty solid time. The contrast between the innards of the metro and the few times you venture outside is intense. I actually felt dread having to put on the gas mask and deal with the apocalypse, monsters and other scavengers that had become Russia. Ultimately the game is "meh" good, but plays really well, looks fine, and is DirectX 11 ready, not a great game... which it might have been. Moreover, this effort is an insect who dreamt he was a man and loved it. But now the dream is over... and the insect is awake. What?
EHFCS rates this game: C+
Graphics: B | Sound: C | Playability: C+
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Botticelli's "The Birth of Venus" hangs in my Villa. |
Assassin's Creed II is a 15th Century Italian travelogue. If you have ever studied Renaissance Italy in an art or history class then being placed in the middle of some of the most famous ancient relics and architecture in the world is staggering. The amount of precise detail the cities you get to roam around in is unparalleled; each town, every building and street rendered perfectly; in essence capturing the unique flavor and esthetics of each. In Assassin’s Creed II it is a joy simply to look up.
Once you get used to the mechanics of the mouse and keyboard, the parkour, combat, and all around character movement becomes intuitive. I can’t really imagine playing this game with a control pad. Also, the sword play, this time around, is leaps and bounds better than the first iteration, it's much more fluid and mercurial.
The story is standard sci-fi, and continues the plot forward into different, but sometimes predictable directions. But who cares? It’s a kick-ass game that looks insanely beautiful. I mean, if you told me the plot of any great sci-fi book, movie or game it would probably sound really stupid. Tell someone the story of “Star Wars” or “Alien” (if you can find someone on the planet that clueless) …although it’s totally rad, it's also totally stupid. So, if you told me that I can leap into my ancestors’ past memories, which were handed down biologically through DNA… then strap my ass in the DNA reading/Matrix thingamajig and let’s get crackin’! Although I seriously doubt that any of my Polish/Russian ancestors were assassins connected to a secret society that was at war with the Templars.
Note: One weird thing I have noticed in these sandbox games is the absence of children. In all the GTA, and Assassin’s Creed games there are absolutely no kids, just adults meandering around. I know it’s probably a cost/time/production thing, or maybe some weird moral code to not insert kids in a game where you could attack them with a sword, but they would merely serve as an immersion device, and could be rendered indestructible. I mean, I would not run around Venice attempting to slaughter all the children if by chance they were there. I know some people that would… but I wouldn't. Lie, I would probably try a few whacks on a kid with a sword to see what would happen, and if the penalty was three quarters of my life being removed, you can bet your ass I would quickly grow tired of it.
Get this game, write down some of the locations, the names of buildings and art pieces, then investigate more.
EHFCS rates this game: A+
Graphics: A+ | Sound: A | Playability: A+
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Oh Rapture, how I missed thee! |
Making a good sequel is a bitch. Incredible 1st acts are very tough to follow. Excellent consistent franchises are even tougher. It's a feat rarely accomplished in any media, let alone video games. The great ones that immediately come to mind are: Super Mario Bros. 3, Mega-Man 2-10x (before it just got stupid) and more recently: GTA III through IV and Far Cry 2, as for the rest, well they just sort of suck, that, plus the whole giant, debatable list was not mentioned here.
BioShock was a truly staggering, inventive and memorable first act; sure it had some crappy moments, check that: unabashedly crappy moments, most of which felt rushed, like the boss battle at the end. It was as if the writers were stuck on how to end the thing and some douche yelled, "I know... BOSS BATTLE!" Everyone groaned, but nobody could come up with a better plan, so they went with it. That being said, it STILL did not stop me from playing through the game four complete times.
I'm on my second run though of BioShock 2 and this game is amazing on so many levels. I am glad to be back in Rapture and my character this time is truly a badass. BioShock 2 feels like it surpasses the original in many ways, while retaining the charm and awe factor from the first, emotional content notwithstanding. This game has multiplayer, which I hate (any form of multiplayer), but I dipped into it for a bit and had some fun. BioShock, and the environs of Rapture, will always remain a solo adventure for me, not be spoiled, well, not really spoiled, but more like upstaged by some 12 year old, level 50, frag-master and his drill, no thanks!
If you were left with a feeling of emptiness at the conclusion of your initial play through, take a deep breath, wait a day and play thought it again... trust me.
EHFCS rates this game: A
Graphics: A+ | Sound: B+ | Playability: A+
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Guns. |
If there were ever a game that didn't need the slightest iota of a story, this is that game. For where there lacks a semblance of a story; the combination of beautiful cell shaded graphics, great main characters, and a variable plethora of randomly generated weapons utterly makes up for it and fills the story void. I mean, there is a story... sort of, but who cares. The care and painstaking attention to detail that went into this game is obvious: and it is a pleasure to play... and play... and play.
The three available DLC packages (see above links) for this game are awesome, and are well worth the $10.00 price tag. One DLC download added not only fun additional playable content, but a safe to store your extra loot, and believe me, it was much appreciated. This game is all about loot, and although I stopped using a particular handgun early on in the adventure, I had become sort of attached to it, it was good luck, but was ultimately taking up space... so the addition of a loot container allowed me to keep my prized possession! This game is fun, and I look forward to even more DLC that has been announced for the future. If you are a shooter fan... get this game! If you are a light RPG fan... get this game! If you like both... GET THIS GAME!
Note: Word of Borderlands’ 4th DLC episode came from publisher Take-Two at a news conference. During a talk the company’s president and CEO, Ben Feder, referenced the success of Gearbox’s Borderlands, he then commented that Take-Two “will continue to support the title with add-on content.”
EHFCS rates this game: A
Graphics: A+ | Sound: B | Playability: A
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Q: Who are you? |
After repeatedly crashing and freezing my computer a mere few minuets into this game (right before they get on the elevator during the opening sequence) I was ready to stomp the crap out of this effort. I mean, COME ON! I tried adjusting my overclock, GPU settings and still it failed right before they got on that f--king elevator. Figuring that it might be a sound issue and after doing some research, I turned off the sound within the game and finally made it thought that glitch (then turning the sound levels back on) and ventured into a truly fun and exciting experience.
The combat and combat controls are fluid and intuitive. The Riddler challenges are not stale, but actually adds to the story (think booking through Gears of War, and then having to look around for those lame dog tags) this is not that, at all. The entire campaign, although rather short, had me from beginning to end, and the story was imbibed with an intriguing Batman feeling. I was bummed when it was over. Finally they got a super hero game right! I look forward to more downloadable content, there are a few cool maps available now for free at the Games for Windows LIVE Marketplace.
Go, right now... buy or steal this game and play it. Oh, there were a few more freezes along the way, but nothing to really go insane about, I could tell when it was about to happen, so I esc'd out and shut the game down.
EHFCS rates this game: A+
Graphics: A+ | Sound: A | Playability: A+
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SPOILER ALERT: The final boss battle went on, and on, and on and on, and on, and on, and on, and on, and on, and on, and on, and on! |
First, I was bummed that there is no real dedicated website for this game, just a bunch of crappy pages from CAPCOM associated with the Resident Evil history and mythos ...yawn. I couldn't even easily find the game within that mess, instead I was taken to page after page of wasted time ...fail. Instead, I posted a link to the GameSpot page dedicated to it. Second, this game is beyond stupid. Third, I hate flash cut scenes wherein I have to timely hit keys in order to make the idiot jump out of the way or duck or jump over things.
Fourth, as noted above, I was practically yelling at my monitor in frustration wanting this f--king game to be over already, but the final boss douche bag was one never dying son of a bitch, and instead of being changeling or fun, it just went on and on, and on. It was like watching the Tampa Bay Buccaneers or the Oakland Raiders play, only worse. Fifth, through 99.9% of the game in chief, my sidekick never got in the way, it was only till the very end, when I needed her gone the most, did I sink more ammo into the back of that bitches head... WHAT!?
Lastly, this release reminded me of how prosaic the typical gaming formula can be: exotic setting, fight a bunch of enemies, discover some stuff; or a puzzle perhaps, fight the boss... repeat. I know most action titles follow this rule, it's embedded in gaming genes, but when it is done right, you never realize you are in it... however with this effort I was constantly aware I was playing a game, which for me, well... that sucks.
EHFCS rates this game: B-
Graphics: A | Sound: B | Playability: C+
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No. Stop. |
Spore Galactic Adventures sucks. The End.
EHFCS rates this game: F+
Graphics: D- | Sound: D- | Playability: F-
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She sounds just like: Lara Croft. |
Um, yeah... anyway. This is only a stealth game, and not my usual cup of tea, but if you are into other mostly stealth games like Hitman, then you will most definitely, maybe enjoy this title. The checkpoint save system is a pain in the ass, but I am almost positive it's needed based on how you go about playing the game: slow and carefully... more yawn. The controls are good and responsive, and the atmosphere is very Nazi, depressing and brown/ish. The whole bullet time/negligee option was a bit weird and out of place, pink morphine and roses? What? Sounds like an evening with my ex-girlfriend.
The characters, I think, are speaking real German, and if they aren't, it's the best faux German, EVER! This game is supposed to be based on real events (most WWII games are... unless they have zombies), and the lead character was supposed to have... yawn. I made it into the first few levels, then I was totally over it. Again, if you are a stealthy gamer player person, then this game would ...be ...fun? ... yawn.
EHFCS rates this game: D+
Graphics: C+ | Sound: C |
Playability: D
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Wait. What vs. What? |
I am currently playing Cryostasis, Velvet Assassin, GTA IV and F.E.A.R. 2... wait, check that... I am currently ONLY playing Plants vs. Zombies. The joys of strategically tending my garden against hoards of zombies that either amble, bum-rush or pole vault in order to get into my house and eat my brains are endless. This game keeps on giving from the replayable main game to the obsessively replayable mini-games. I have done nothing but this. Thank you Popcap for ruining my life!
I have to go, I need to wake up the snail that tends to the coins produced by the plants in my zen garden; yes, you read that correctly.
EHFCS rates this game: A
Graphics: B+ | Sound: B+ | Playability: A+
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Crashes ...and patches. Crashes ...and MORE patches. |
Driver issues are not an excuse for bad gaming anymore, it's just plain old poor development and code programming. SLI (scalable link interface) has been out for a long time... so, driver issues are not an excuse anymore either, it's very bad development and programming. Patching a game repeatedly upon release, and with each one causing brand new issues and crashes is not an excuse anymore, it's horrific development and programming. Seriously, I struggled through most of the game without any patches, but ripe with crashes, then installed the lot, and then the game would not even load, just a quick crash to the desktop... JUST LIKE ITS PREDESESSOR DID.
GSC Game World should not be allowed to make, produce and sell any more games. Seriously, this game developer gives computer gaming a bad name. Why should anyone spend good earned cash or fast fingers/jail time on something so solidly terrible? Anyway, the game is a prologue to the first release, so many of the maps will be familiar... and... and... and.. forget it, who really cares. Don't waste your money, get FarCry 2 or Fallout 3 or Left 4 Dead/2 instead.
Recently these goofs released S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Call of Pripyat and I wish this series would just go away already.
EHFCS rates this game: F-
Graphics: B+ | Sound: C+ | Playability: F-
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Hold up |
Characters that get added to your party? Check! Good versus Evil choices and scenarios? Check! Special "Force" powers? Check! Endless hours of dialog trees? Check Mate!
Yes. I have been down this long road three times before, and two 1/2 times I have really liked it.
I was a Jedi... twice, and then some Asian hero the third time, and by that third time I was already skipping through endless dialog trees and beginning not to care. Yes, I played this game three times, oh the settings and locations are different, but the pacing and general concept has been done, and by the same developer. Sure they do it well, but come on guys... enough of this same trick. This game lasted a whole 13 minutes on my hard drive before I was so uninterested, and so bored with the respective and mundane dialog trees, that I could not wait to get the bloody thing un-installed and up for sale on eBay. It only took about three rounds of meeting NPC's that pushed ...the ...plot ...along before I was pounding keys, any key, to skip through it. That's not a very good or fun time.
You play as template default guy or girl (or you can create your own character image with a very robust character creator), as with the other three, you then meander around cool locations talking to people, fighting foes, gaining XP and gathering up tons of sweet loot, um... just like the prior three games! At least with KOTOR (Knights of the Old Republic I & II) I was really into the story, dialog choices and gathering up all that great Star Wars universe loot and leveling up my character(s). Here I spent about ten seconds in the update screen scratching my head in frustration as I had no idea what was going on there... at all, and I really had no desire to find out or even figure it out. Oh, and your hero in Mass Effect has what basically amounts to special "force powers" implemented with some mechanized limbs and such, huh? I honestly cannot rate the whole game because I bailed so fast, but that might be a slight indication that you can't package the same thing over and over again and call it different. If I was not familiar with the KOTOR games and Jade Empire then this experience would have been fresh and interesting. I just did not have the patience to wade through the thousands upon thousands of lines of dialog... AGAIN. Fight. Talk. Fight. Talk.
The graphics are good, but not "next gen" good, also the shaders on the faces were blotchy and surprisingly unpolished, call me silly but stuff like that kills a bit of the immersion for me. The game play, for the half of a level that I played was a bit tactical and worked as a simple shooter. The game installed easily and without indecent on my system which is XP, but Vista users may/probably will have issues (subsequently, as of this writing, a patch has been released addressing these issues).
This game would be great for those uninitiated with KOTOR, and good luck finding those who aren't. If this is your first time with a BioWare product, I am almost hard pressed not to say, skip it, buy KOTOR I and II, then play Mass Effect.
EHFCS rates this game: C+
Graphics: C+ | Sound: B+ | Playability: C+
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Horrible! Terrible! Crap! |
This horrible excuse for a game, Turning Point: Fall of Liberty, lasted about 20 min's of playtime and exactly 22 min's of hard drive residence, thank you. The enemy is/are/am stupid, there are excessive sound and dialogue glitches, the controls are buggy, so... there is nothing at all redeeming about this crappy effort.
EHFCS rates this game: F+
Graphics: F+ | Sound: F+ | Playability: D+
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Crap ...I have incurable malaria! |
From the moment I was initially dropped into FARCRY 2 or FAR CRY 2 (which is it?) I knew I was in for a great experience. As with most of my reviews I don't like to give to much away, either on detail, story or anything really. I think that the surprises are best left to be discovered by the individual playing. A lot of game magazines (well, there is only one these days related specifically to PC games, unfortunately) tend to blather on about unimportant details, give too much away, and wax prosaic in verbal self-importance about this or that. What I will mostly tell you here is whether the game sucks or if it's worth your/my valuable time and cash... and again, that is subjective, but this game is worth every cent and second. It truly lives up to its bold boast in delivering a new take on the FPS experience.
Some of the FPS elements will of coarse be familiar to players, but the lush African atmosphere, characters, diamond collecting, quests, map ...and intense combat gives it a totally different spin. As with most games it is not without some faults, which I will revisit after a while, until then, dig in, and have a blast.
However, (let the complaining begin) I do wish there were more animals depicted in the game. The zebras and water buffalo were cool, but the addition of some elephants and some lions would have been sweet. I never really hunted anything, or tried to kill these creatures, but I did occasionally run over a few while driving. THUD! LOL! But strangely, after a while, I did my best to avoid anymore unnecessary road kill. There was this amazing in-game moment where I was being chased and a water buffalo ran directly in front of my pursuers car causing the vehicle to end over and explode... is was amazing, and seemed definitely not scripted.
Some have complained about the vastness of the game, and the amount of walking or driving you have to do, this did not bother me, the day/night cycles were cool, and I just enjoyed the stroll, mostly. There has been some major complaints regarding the enemy respawning at the guard stations, even the developers admitted this was a programming over site as they new it was happening, but did nothing about it, but I found this to add to the realism of the experience. I mean if you kill the enemy at the posts then drive off to do something else, it would seem plausible that the higher ups would send more men to take their places. So, whatever... this game rocks! Thank you.
EHFCS rates this game: A+
Graphics: A+ | Sound: A+ | Playability: A+
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Horrible non-existing keyboard mapping sloppiness. Fail. |
I'm forced to use WASD, which I never use, so... I mean, what's so hard to program arrow or kp_ keys? Why do ports usually suck so bad anyway?
I may have to bite the bullet on this one and play it, since the reviews are so good, but I really hate acquiescing. Not playing this game because of key mapping issues is a sort of silent protest for me, which usually, read: always, falls on deaf ears anyway, but I just might... maybe. Plus the dude's suit looks cool.
I bit the blood soaked ray gun and gave this game a try despite the inability to totally remap the keys. I am currently digging this effort, however, I am still not used to playing WASD, and to tell you the truth, I don't really like it. Being said creature of habit, I like my keys as they should be: comfortable and second nature, something I don't have to think about. Having all that real estate between the left keys and the mouse bothers me. I suppose being left handed on the mouse would be a benefit, but since I'm not... nuff said.
Update: June 29, 2009 Dunzo
I tried, but try as I might, I cannot... will not... won't play WASD. This sucks, because the game really looks amazing, and the spookiness factor is way up there, accompanied by genuinely scary sound effects, but the mouse and keyboard controls are so sluggish and horrible that any more than two monsters on screen at a time leads to total frustration rather than fun.
I am confused that something so unimportant to actual game play as navigating the contents of the RIG would be hard bound to the arrow keys... bad move. Hopefully these issues will be addressed in the sequel, if they even port that game.
EHFCS rates this game: C+
Graphics: A | Sound: A+ | Playability: D-
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Are you f--king kidding me? |
I really didn't want to believe all the horrible press after the PC Port release of this game was getting since I had been waiting for over a year to play this thing (and each predecessor had been filthy great). I have waited patiently, with anticipation for each PC release, and was thrilled with each one, however this steaming pile of crap does not even deserve a box picture.
I am insulted as a longtime gamer, PC enthusiast, and dedicated GTA-o-phile, that I would have to jump through so many hoops and technical errors and NOT even get to play this POS. I am furious. How dare they make me have to sign into the Rockstar "social club" when I have no need for multiplayer. How dare I need a "Windows Live" account, which is such a failed, stupid, unnecessary gaming initiative anyway, to play this game.
Thanks for stealing $50.00 from me, but would you mind using lube next time, and maybe a kiss goodbye in the morning? Your debacle has been wiped from my drive and thrown into the trash. What a crummy joke and another strike against PC gaming. Thank you Rockstar for utterly and completely blowing it, this is the Grand Freaking Canyon of epic gaming fails.
EHFCS rates this game: F-
Graphics: A+ | Sound: A+ | Playability: F-
GTA IV Note: May 23, 2009
Finally installed (re-tried 2 months later). Played through first three missions: I LOVE THIS GAME. At first, I was taken aback by how the shadows are produced, never saw anything like it, they are not the average "soft" shadows, but some sort of organic mess, and after awhile it makes sense. I am still not a fan of Windows Live Games by any means, and I recently had a issue trying to download the new DLC for Fallout 3, each new product costing 800 Microsoft Points (terrible), however, the games never downloaded, and I'm still trying to get my money refunded (note: this issue ended up being the result of AVG, once I quit the program the content downloaded fine). They (Microsoft) should take a page from Steam's book, and do things right, but needless to say, when you get past the stupidity and utter uselessness that is Windows Live Games, and get to the mean streets of GTA IV... it's time to start kicking some Russian ass.
EHFCS rates this game: A+
Graphics: A+ | Sound: A+ | Playability: A
GTA IV Update: July 19, 2009
Just when I really got into the game, I mean to the point of consecutive late night sessions, i mean really getting into it... the next day I received: gtaiv.exe has encountered a problem and needs to close. Sorry for the inconvenience.
Do what?
Wait What?
Excuse me?
I just played this game, no longer than 6 hours ago on the same computer, with absolutely no changes to the system whatsoever! You have got to be f--king kidding me!!! F--k you Games For Windows, f--k you DRM & SecuROM, and f--k you Rockstar Games Social Club!
Dear Game Developer Retards at Rockstar,
Would you mind refunding me the freaking hours of time I wasted dealing with this bloated piece of stinky poop, plus the cost of the game? All totaled, I would say you owe me $103.42 for pain and suffering.
Sincerely,
Mr. Dunzo
EHFCS rates this game: F-
Graphics: F+ | Sound: F+ | Playability: F-
GTA IV Update: September 5, 2009
Got the game up and running again, and by some miraculous intervention my saves were in tack... so... I sort of jumped right back into the campaign, but was sidetracked by numerous other titles.
Honestly?
I'm actually not all that ready to just start trusting the game again. After all that has happened... I'm still leery, and I need a bit more time away before I decide to invest again. I need to look out for me... yup.
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The future sure looks bleak. |
I have to admit this, I am not a patient RPG player, although I really enjoy playing the games, I cannot get past the whole leveling up process (which is basically the whole point to an RPG), the time it takes, slowly getting stronger by one small XP inch at a time. That being said, maxing a character out in Fallout 3 does not take all that long to accomplish, which for me was a relief. That being said... I probably added three quarters+ of my XP through the XP console cheat, then I set the game at the hardest setting, which, for all insects and purchases, let me play the game mostly as a shooter... and I enjoyed every moment of it, but in all fairness Fallout 3 actually does do a great job of doling out XP, Perks and other upgrades for further character development.
I explored everywhere and everything. I took my time and soaked everything in. One can play this game following through the main story quests arc, (although I would highly advise against it for the sake of fun), or get busy checking stuff out in the Capitol Wasteland and getting side-quests accidentally, then, when you feel like it, move the main story along. That later process was a cool way of letting the game unfold organically. The characters, and dialogue in this effort are far more developed, flushed out, and natural sounding than in Oblivion, which had this incredibly annoying glitch by where a character's initial contact voice was different than it's dialogue tree voice... weird.
This game is thoughtful and emotional. After my initial sadness after it ended, as I had spent hours and many late nights returning to the world, I started the whole process again, this time with different goals, tactics and character development. There is supposed to be some downloadable content coming for this game in January, February and March of 09, (as of this writing there is a bunch of DLC available) I can't wait. That being said...
EHFCS rates this game: A+
Graphics: A+ | Sound: A+ | Playability: A+
Quick Reviews:
Ultimate Sith Edition Star Wars: The Force Unleached
Um. You mean the Ultimate Sh-t Edition, right?
Sloppy + Horrible + Unplayable Port = total bummer!
F+
Cryostasis
No point to it. Looks, sort of, good. Lame.
C+
BioShock
Awesome. Perfect. Inventive. More please!
A+
The Orange Box
Great story. Fleshed out characters. A great interactive adventure. An emotional experience. Valve kicks ass (again). I cannot wait for Half-Life 2 Episode 3!
A+
The World Of Goo
Goo-riffic. The music drove me a bit bonkers after a while.
C+
Call of Duty 4 - Modern Warfare
Exceptionable game play. Fun. Awesome graphics.
B+
A+ for multiplayer
Assassin's Creed
Intriguing story. Beautiful settings. The boss battles are just beyond terrible.
A
Bully - Scholarship Edition
Stupidly fun. Not such a horrible port.
B
Crysis
Fun. Predictable. Crashable. Re-playable.
B+
Gears of War
Really good port. Additional content for the PC. Searching for the dog tags feels forced and unnecessary, pulling you out of the rhythm of the game.
B+
Drool:
More Reviews Soon, Including:
Mass Effect 2
Riddick
Just Cause 2
Dragon Age Origins
F.E.A.R. 2
Aliens vs Predator
Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2
Call of Duty: World at War
Braid
Star Wars: The Force Unleached 2
Mafia II
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